Hold Me
i want to write but there is nothing on mind to write about.
i cannot catch flies and feed them.
they appear and disappear.
i go to sleep, and wake up, to his presence.
the physic of my world is changed.
it feels irreversible, but i am still scared.
i am scared of forgetting.
there are no others; there is only the other.
i am scared to welcome them.
i don’t know in which form they will appear to me.
i don’t know in which form i will appear to them.
i am scared that they will hurt me.
i am scared that i will hurt them.
I am taken to the edge of the world,
I don’t know how to walk back into it.
the language of the world is too volatile.
the movement of the world is disorienting.
the world is made to steal you, not stay with you.
meaning is not needed, but the ground is.
the world is not the ground; it is ungrounding.
i am looking through a window,
I see the window,
It shows what is behind me,
and what is in front of me.
I look through layers.
I live through layers.
the balance did not disappear.
the balance is balanced.
the same side is no longer winning automatically.
there is no running.
there is no leaving.
opposites can stay together.
silence is the ground.
being is untouchable.
being is unmovable.
inaccessible externally.
extension is not the source.
the source holds.
the extension pulls.
his arms push you to his hug.
he is on both ends.
hold me.
hold me in your silence.
hold me.
hold me in your ground.
who could believe;
freedom meant no-movement.
no-movement of body,
no-movement of thought,
no-movement of tongue,
detachment did not mean stopping.
no-movement is detachment from movement.
stillness is the movement.
harm is entering the movement.
without knowing stillness.
harm is distorting the purity of movement.
there is one look.
there are countless eyes.
freedom, is.